Hello, I am a fifteen year old teen girl. And this problem is preventing me from living my life in peace. Viewers, can you please help me?
There are some people at my school, who were my friends before. But now they are more or less my enemies. They are actually very different-spoilt kids of mostly rich parents you'll say. They hang around with their boyfriends and go on talking to them with their cell phones all the time and go on tampering with their parents trust on them. But the thing is, I am not their type. Most of the people are not actually. They kinda first thought I had leaked their secrets to people they I haven't. But they troubled me neverthless, for sometime anyways. But the main reason is what I think is that they think I am boring and they always talked that among themselves.
To be honest, this is kinda truth but thats because I am not able to express myself freely among them as they are not my type. They are, simply different. But you should see, the much I am boring among them, I am atleast ten times as much funny and popular and retorting or giving-the-correct-back-answer-type in my colony and my tutions and whoever stranger or new people I meet, and it has always been like that from the start. I feel that maybe I was so used to popularity that for once I became unpopular and broke away. And the main thing now that has struck me is that I am not able to retort them easily as I do with other people. In the middle I was feeling my life was worthless. Even my dreams of doing something big is getting tampered. And now I am also afraid that they might do something horrible if I accidently do something wrong to them. And yup, they also take away my best friend when I am talking to her or just spending time with her. Its just like they want to make me get isolated.
So what am I supposed to do? How can I live life as happily no matter whatever they do? How can I take my mind off this problem or atleast stop thinking about it? And is it really very important to be all popular and retorting and funny? Does that really matter?
Please viewers, give me a solution with as many real life examples as you can!
Thank you.
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Thanks a lot Miss Dinu! You are probably right! My life is much more better of without these friends. And your reply just touched my heart and also boosted up my confidence (a great deal at that!), it was great! Thanks a lot again and I wish you a best of luck in your life as well!
from Aratrika Bera (15 year old)
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Dear Bera -Please click on this link to read a comment on your problems.
http://onepercent.sulekha.com/blog/post/2008/07/dear-dinu-agony-aunt-column-7.htm
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thanks for the comment. I suppose you are right. I'll have a try.
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Hey bera,
First, relax! You are taking a very insignificant issue beyond your limits. And that's not required. If you are not comfortable with your friends whom you think do not flow with your wavelength, just ignore them. Trust me, they dont really matter. Be with someone whom you are comfortable with. You know where your strength lies, right? So why give heed to things that tamper your self confidence? Just try to do your thing with your kind of people and if that still doesnt work, have a chat with them. Ask them why they act indifferent towards you. If you get a satistying answer that makes sense, then act accordingly but also be prepared to receive criticism cos if they point out something wrong on your part, you should only try and correct it instead of retorting.
And to your question: "And is it really very important to be all popular and retorting and funny?" i would say just be yourself, even if it means you are unpopular and boring. You dont have to change for others, you just have to adjust. There's a lot of difference between both.
I hope my two cents help you. If it does, do let me know. I'd be glad to know my words made a difference. :)
Cheers and all the best
psych
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Sorry Indu3 to got u confused. She is my daughter. This is one is her greatest school problem. She wants advise from all of you people...
S. Bera
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Sorry people,
I am the daughter of Mr. Somnath Bera. My name is Aratrika Bera. Sorry to confuse you all. Actually this is one of my problem and I need some ideas to get over it. Thanks them who had already given me some.
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Hey Friends,
Soory to get you all confused. This blog was made by my daughter Aka.
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Bera,
Lemme play the agony uncle...
So here's moi solutions:
So what am I supposed to do?
Ignore them! If all you do is think about outsmarting them all the time or be fearful of them...you ain't going nowhere. Divert your mind into doing something that you enjoy.
How can I live life as happily no matter whatever they do?
Don't let others decide your state of happiness...especially when the *others* are insignificant to your life.
How can I take my mind off this problem or atleast stop thinking about it?
See reply to question numbah 1.
And is it really very important to be all popular and retorting and funny?
Trying to be someone else is such a waste of who you are...Curt Kobain said this...so be happy wid whatever you are gal!
Does that really matter?
Being yourself matters...
Be good!
PF
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leave a solution through comments please.
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